I’ve returned from my last trip to the Farmer’s Market. I’ll be here one more Monday, but I can’t justify buying more food when I have so much in the freezer to get rid of before I leave. I’m also mostly done with the bike, though I may ride into town a couple more times for produce and/or groceries. I wanted to love the bike, really I did. The mile-long roundtrips to town and back aren’t bad. Those four-mile trips to and from the farmer’s market though? Every single one ended with me feeling like I was going to pass out, puke, or both. It was always the return trip that did me in. I was carrying extra weight and riding against the wind. Perhaps without these factors, I could’ve come close to saying I almost enjoyed those bike rides. 

When last I wrote, I was posting on the laptop using my phone as a hotspot, because the WiFi was out. I was without WiFi until Friday afternoon. This was beyond annoying, but I tried to make the best of it; blasting some tunes to sing to, reading, working on garden plans. I was thrilled to get it back, though.

I’ve learned an important lesson during this sabbatical. The best laid plans are useless when you are at the mercy of a town’s inadequate infrastructure. This sounds extremely pessimistic. I’m a woman who lives by a schedule. I don’t wing it. I want to be one of those people that can go with the flow. For my first sabbatical, I tried to give myself a break. I didn’t have a lot of expectations. My only goal was to stay sane during the bleak winters that always take me down in Nashville. In Miami, I conditioned myself to live in the moment more. Appreciate the time alone, make my own decisions, soak up the sun, breathe and just be. Somewhere along the way, I’ve forgotten how to do these things and my true reason for going south for winter. I came into this year’s sabbatical with a plan. I was going to take my online course, plan my garden, read all the books, watch all the shows, ride my bike everywhere, work out, eat healthier. My expectations were high. I have read several books, and I’m proud of the work I’ve put into my garden plans, even though I’m still not finished and thought I would be by now. The weather hasn’t been as wonderful as it was last year, resulting in several windy, cloudy days. I lost some of that solar power I’d banked on. The bike rides were not fun, and I remembered that I hate to work out. The food at the farmer’s market was way too delicious, and it was easier to buy ready-made dinners than make something healthy for myself. The WiFi has been out for 20% of this sabbatical. To most of you, these would be minor glitches. I’m disappointed in myself, for not following through on my goals and for letting the weather/WiFi issues bother me so much. I want to find that person I discovered during my first sabbatical, but I’m running out of time. 

Pierce started training at T.J. Maxx last Thursday, and his first day went very well. For the last few years, Pierce has made a habit of running upstairs to greet me when I get home. Every day it’s the same: “Hi mom! How was work?” I usually have a one-word answer, because that’s all he needs to hear: fine, hot, busy, exhausting. I ask him what he did that day, and he usually gives a brief response. Then he jogs back down to his room, satisfied with the successful back-and-forth exchange. On Thursday, I couldn’t wait to greet him. “Hi Pierce! How was work?” I wasn’t there to ask him in person, but this text convo was the highlight of my day. I’m looking forward to more of this.